Party Of Love And Tolerance Wishes Death On Political Opponent

Babylon Bee

U.S.—The party known for being loving and tolerant of everyone also wished for the death of their political opponent this week, with many Democrats on social media erupting in celebration as Senator Rand Paul announced he had tested positive for the coronavirus.

"Love everyone, unless they are on the other side of the aisle from you, then may they die a horrible death," said vocal progressive activist Squish McGee. "We are all about loving people who are different from ourselves, as long as they think exactly the same. It's all about love, bro. Also, I hope you die if you think slightly differently."

Nancy Pelosi's daughter, Christine Pelosi, tweeted, "Rand Paul's neighbor was right," referring to an incident where Paul's neighbor had brutally assaulted him, once again showing what good Catholics the Pelosis are. "We don't hate anyone," Christine Pelosi said. "We're good Catholics, and we aren't allowed to hate. That's just science."

"And apropos of nothing, I wish Rand had been beaten to death, and I hope the coronavirus finishes the job Paul's neighbor started," she added. "Also, how dare you."