Scandal: WSJ Reports Trump’s Name Appears In Their Article About The Epstein Files
NEW YORK, NY — In what many were calling the greatest political scandal in American history, the Wall Street Journal confirmed that Donald Trump's name does, in fact, appear in the article about the Epstein File that was recently written by the Wall Street Journal.
"This is damning, earth-shattering stuff," said WSJ journalist Cliff Buttly, who wrote the article. "As I scanned the article I recently wrote about Epstein, I found Trump's name appeared in there 23 times. I'm not sure how Trump can manage to walk away from this bombshell unscathed."
At this time, sources were unclear on the specific connection between Trump and Epstein, or why his name was mentioned in the Wall Street Journal article so many times, but all agreed that the story was too troubling to ignore.
"It's right there, plain as day," said one WSJ reader who asked to remain anonymous. "In the first paragraph of this article, it says 'TRUMP TRUMP TRUMP I HATE TRUMP.' I'm not sure what that means or why it's relevant to the rest of this article about Epstein, but it is certainly a disturbing bit of new information."
Thousands of concerned citizens called for a full investigation based on the shockingly numerous instances of Trump's name in the WSJ article about Epstein, and demanded that Trump provide an explanation.
At publishing time, Democrats had also called for an investigation into Trump's suspicious appearance in the nightmares they had last night.
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