The Democratic Disaster Just Got Even More Hilarious
Article by Kurt Schlichter in "Townhall":
So, now the Democrats are choosing between a pair of doddering crustaceans. The Crusty Commie Curmudgeon and the Crusty Comedy Relief both did well enough Tuesday to keep going. Big Chief Warren, whose actual people call corn “corn” and not “maize,” may still go on because she’s an insufferable monster whose transcendent yearning to nag us into schoolmarm’d submission knows no bounds, plus because the establishment wants her in the race siphoning Chablis socialist votes away from her Marx brother. But the Hapless Halfling dropped out, a half-billion bucks lighter, and he’s not just returning to his burrow. He’ll want to remain a Dem player – he’ll keep spending like an NFL superstar in the Champagne Room at the Peppermint Pasty gentleman’s club after getting his signing bonus paid in singles, and the Lil’ Loser hopes to make it rain until he drowns Donald Trump in a sea of greenbacks.
But the battle is really for the shriveled heart of the Democrat Party, and no one better represents the yin and the yang of that dying collection of power-hungry elitists and grasping greedos than the doddering socialist Sanders and that Biden guy who should by all rights be chasing that damn know-it-all squirrel around the park.
Biden reps the establishment, with his last fifty years of failure in Washington tracking exactly his party’s last fifty years of failure in Washington. And Sanders represents the fresh face of a 150-year-old murder cult that only people as dumb as Hollywood stars, college kids, and kale-gobbling hipsters would be stupid enough to let near power. If you’re not seeing anything for you between them, there’s a reason why – whichever loser they choose, you can be sure that you’ll be the enemy. With Sanders, you’ll be a Kulak, and with Biden, you’ll be a Kulak Lite. So, basically, you’ll be Ted Lieu-ed either way, but under Joe, your end might come a little slower, as is his won't.
You have the center-left guy who is trying to be a leftist and you have the leftist who is totally being a leftist, ignoring that most of America is not leftist-curious. They all talk a good game about “unity,” but we know that the second they have the chance they’ll do everything they can to ensure we never have the chance to vote their kind out again. Little Loser Mike, in his remarkably clueless speech given before he saw the writing written on the lower part of the wall after Super Tuesday, talked about how he would banish the forces of indecency then literally a line later talked about unifying the country. Seems pretty hard to unify America when you just labeled half of Americans “indecent,” but far be it from me to dare to criticize the genius who has won more primaries than me or you – albeit, one more, and that was American Samoa at a cost of $500 million.
Super Tuesday settled nothing. This fight is going to go on for the next six months until one of these fossils “wins.” And then Trump is going to kick the Schiff out him right up into November.
https://townhall.com/columnists/kurtschlichter/2020/03/05/the-democratic-disaster-just-got-even-more-hilarious-n2563068
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