Daniel Penny Judge Tells Jury To Go Back And Deliberate Again Until They Come Back With The Correct Verdict

Babylon Bee🐝

NEW YORK CITY — Judge Maxwell Wiley has ordered the jury in Daniel Penny's trial to go back and keep on deliberating until they come back with a different verdict.

After four days of deliberation, the jury announced that Penny could not be found guilty of manslaughter. Judge Wiley asked if maybe the jury could just pretend that never happened, and instructed them to think of some new charge to deliberate about until they changed their minds.

"Ugh, you guys are making this so hard," sighed Wiley, holding his head in his hands. "Can we all just go around and each of you say what charge you would find him guilty of? Is that against the law? Aw, fine. Well, how about we just all make-believe that he was never charged with manslaughter and the last few weeks were all a dream. Deal? Now, you all go back there and talk about some new charge and hey -- try come back with the right verdict this time, okay?"

According to sources in the courtroom, Penny's defense attorneys argued that such a move was obviously illegal and was a blatant move by the judge to pressure the jury. "Your honor, with all due respect, I don't think we are allowed to ask the jury to play make-believe," argued attorney Thomas Kenniff. "Your honor, would you please put down the giant 'GUILTY' posterboard?"

At publishing time, Judge Wiley had asked the prosecution to go sit in with the jury while they deliberate to make sure they got it right this time.