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Shut it all down

Fifteen days to slow the debt.

I hear the government might have to shut down. That’s the best news I’ve heard in months. Let’s shut it all down.

Turnabout is fair play, after all.

If government can shut down our businesses, our jobs, and our schools, it’s only fair that we can shut them down. If government can deem some of us “essential” and others “non-essential,” it’s only fair that we can do the same to them.

And I deem every last one of these parasitic blood-suckers “non-essential.” So shut it down. Shut it all down.

Board up the windows, turn out the lights, chain the doors shut, and call it a day.

Shut it all down.

While we Americans were struggling to pay our bills, these assholes could spend our money as much as they wanted. What’s a few trillion dollars added to the national debt?

Since the start of this pandemic, Americans have seen their savings dwindle, their income stagnate, the cost of living rise. And all the while that was happening to us, these awful people were spending trillions ostensibly for “COVID relief.”

When they said “We’re all in this together,” they didn’t include themselves.

So while we tightened our belts, reduced our expenses, and lived within our means, they just kept spending.

In fact, they’re not done. They want to spend another five trillion we don’t have. But they need the debt ceiling lifted to do it because, unlike us, these guys never have to worry about not having enough money to pay the bills.

Do you think you could call your credit card company and say, “Hey, I’d like you to remove my spending limit so that I can add an unlimited debt to my credit card. Oh, and I won’t be paying it back.”

We don’t need these people. In fact, if every one of them was deemed non-essential and sent home tomorrow, we’d probably be far better off.

So shut it down. Shut it all down.

Shutter them all – every department. And send them all home, every last cabinet member, every lawmaker, every single bureaucrat, and every staffer — from chief of staff to “strategic communications” director to assistant deputy director of “social media engagement.”

We don’t care where you go, but you can’t stay here.

And if they object, just tell them it’ll only be for fifteen days. Fifteen days to slow the debt. Honest injun, guys. Only fifteen days. You can take that to the bank!

And if they still piss and moan or whine and cry, remind them that they can just as easily watch porn from home as they did from the office.

Oh, and we’re all in this together.