Someone ironed Hillary’s face

More proof, as if we needed it,
that Hillary Clinton has no friends.

Patriot Retort

Joe Biden isn’t the only one who had a little work done recently.  From the looks of it, Hillary Clinton made a visit to the cosmetic surgeon as well.  Either that or someone ironed Hillary’s face.

You can see the pictures over at the Daily Mail.  But prepare yourself.  It’s the most frightening fizzogg since Lion Head lady.

And while Hillary’s neck, lower face and eyes are still as wrinkled as ever, the slope from her lower eyelids to her cheeks is as smooth as a baby’s ass.  It looks like whoever ironed her face either got bored and stopped before he was done, or Hillary decided unnaturally smooth cheeks surrounded by a sea of wrinkles was just the ticket for a night on the town.

I mean look at that!  That’s just unnatural.

The photographer shouldn’t have taken such a close-up shot of her.  From a great distance her ironed face and wrinkled jowls might not be so alarming.  But up close?  Oh, honey.  No.

Truth is, that picture of Hillary looks like a crudely airbrushed photo — less “Maybe it’s Maybelline,” and more “Maybe it’s Photoshop.”  The skin tone is all wrong.  And the inhuman smoothness just looks fake.

Now some people think Hillary getting her face ironed is a sign that she plans to enter the 2020 race.  But if that’s the case, then once again I am convinced that Hillary has no friends.

Because no true friend would encourage a seventy-two-year-old woman to go out in public looking like her cheeks are formed from Play-Doh.

Say, do you think if you mashed Hillary’s cheeks down on the funny papers the print would come off?

Of course the Daily Mail – which has a long history of gushing over hideous things (see their praise of Michelle Obama) – says Hillary “looked wonderfully youthful.”

“Wonderfully youthful?”  Are they serious with this?

I think the phrase they’re grasping for here is “hideously inhuman.”

Listen, I get it.  I’m 56 years old and have lines around my eyes.  My skin no longer has the flush of youth. Instead it has the flush of Lupus.  But as I am neither vain nor crazy as a Betsy bug, it would never occur to me to get my face ironed.  And I certainly wouldn’t flatten one portion while leaving the rest as wrinkled as a linen shirt stuffed at the bottom of a hamper.

If Hillary believes this improves her looks, then she’s even more delusional than we thought.

Just how desperate is she to lose a third Presidential election? How much public humiliation is she willing to endure?

Well, enough to willingly turn her face into some sort of science experiment gone wrong apparently.

Though I’m sure this ironed face look of hers will help Hillary secure the coveted Miami Beach divorcee vote.

And that’s something, right?