Punxsutawney Phil Deported After Birth Certificate Reveals He's From Canada

 Punxsutawney Phil Deported After Birth Certificate Reveals He's From Canada

U.S.·Feb 3, 2025 · BabylonBee.com

PUNXSUTAWNEY, PA — Beloved groundhog Punxsatawny Phil has been deported back to Canada after the rodent failed to produce the needed paperwork at this year's Groundhog Day celebration.

"It was awkward, for sure," ICE Agent David Scranton said. "We had to apprehend him right before they were able to determine anything about the shadow thing so no one knows if there's going to be six more weeks of winter. Sorry America, but we've got to get this furry felon back to Canada."

Phil has resided in the U.S. for the past decade after apparently coming into the country on a now-expired work visa. He told the press he believed he had filled out the right paperwork and was shocked to learn he was being deported right in the middle of his biggest work day of the year.

"EEEEEEE. EEE. EEEEEE!!" Phil said. "EEEEEEEEEEEEE! EEE. EEEEEEEEE. EEEEEE?"

At publishing time, Phil was appealing the arrest but was seeking new counsel after his previous lawyer had been admitted to the hospital with rabies.

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