Biden Still Polling Well With 3 A.M. Mail-In Ballot Demographic

Babylon Bee🐝

U.S. — Despite ominous polling data showing former President Donald Trump holding leads in key battleground states, there are strong indications that President Joe Biden is still polling well among the important 3 A.M. mail-in ballot demographic.

Democratic strategists expressed confidence that this crucial voting block, which played an important role in his 2020 victory, is still firmly in President Biden's corner, leading many insiders to believe that November's presidential election will turn out differently than current battleground polls indicate.

"We'll be just fine," said Biden campaign chief Julie Chavez Rodriguez. "Mr. Trump's camp may be crowing about all the polls showing him having a lead, but we all know which votes are really the important ones. As long as Donald Trump struggles to win the 3 A.M. unverified mail-in votes, President Biden will still end up being the choice of the American people. Joe just knows how to win those middle-of-the-night votes."

While Trump has built impressive leads in many important states heading into the general election, Biden's track record of winning an overwhelming percentage of votes among ballots that surreptitiously arrive after polling locations have closed and don't have verifiable signatures looms large. "Trump can build as big of a lead as he wants," Chavez Rodriguez said. "It won't matter. We know that the 3 A.M. mail-in ballot demographic will come in strong for us in the end. It may even come in stronger for us this year than it did in 2020. In fact, I know it will."

At publishing time, when asked how many 3 A.M. mail-in votes they expected to need, Biden's campaign said it wouldn't know until election night.