The Attention Hogg Shaman
Yesterday, America’s least favorite attention Hogg interfered with an official proceeding in the US Senate when he began shouting like a dangerous extremist and had to be escorted from the room by Capitol Police.
This is sedition and an insurrection and a direct threat to our democracy and … and … and … I’m literally shaking right now!
And here you thought we were rid of this shameless attention Hogg went he managed to get accepted to Harvard University despite being an inarticulate, pencil-necked, sunken-chested white guy.
And for a while, it certainly seemed like his 15 minutes of fame were over.
Remember in 2020 when he ran a Twitter poll to see if people wanted him to post daily videos with his thoughts on the election? More than 90 thousand people voted in his poll and over 80% of them voted No.
But Congress is debating gun control again. So David thinks now is the time to breathe life back into his long-decomposing 15 minutes.
So unauthorized entry to disrupt lawmakers is once again A-okay, guys.
It’s a good thing David the Attention Hogg wasn’t wearing a big Viking hat or he’d have been locked up faster than a debutante’s virtue.
Not that David would ever be caught dead wearing a big, furry horned hat like that. It would smash his perfectly quaffed, heavily-gelled pompadour.
(As an aside, I initially considered titling this “NRA-Anon Shaman,” but since my focus on his desperate need for attention, I changed my mind.)
Anyroad.
I hate this kind of stuff, I really do.
I hated it when screaming idiots disrupted the Kavanaugh hearings. I hated it when idiots swarmed the Capitol on January 6, 2021.
I hate it because mob rule is diametrically opposed to our Constitution.
But I especially hate it coming from an attention Hogg like this pipsqueak in a pompadour.
David Hogg didn’t disrupt this hearing to petition the government for a redress of his grievances.
He did it for retweets, which is why he posted a video of his childish, narcissistic stunt on Twitter.
Just as Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez isn’t really a congresswoman, she just plays one on TV, David Hogg isn’t really a political activist; he just plays one on Twitter.
For him, it’s all about attention.
Then again, that has been the case for this insufferable little twerp since he emerged from the closet in a separate building far away from where his fellow high school students were murdered.
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