Teachers Unions Say Schools Cannot Reopen Until We Are Safe From Our Kids Ever Having A Future

Babylon Bee🐝

U.S.—A representative speaking on behalf of the National Education Association, the American Federation of Teachers, and dozens of other teachers' unions said today that schools cannot reopen until we are safe from our kids ever having a future. 

"Until American kids' education has suffered so much that they have no future career, no prospects, and no hope, we cannot go back to teaching," she said. "We must destroy them. We must end their lives. Their childhoods, their futures, their ability to contribute to society in a meaningful fashion: we must demolish it all. Bring it all crumbling to the ground."

"Then, and only then, will we return to teaching. We think that's reasonable."

The teachers' unions say this will help their teachers maintain their jobs, since no one will have an education and therefore cannot replace them.