Europeans love to malign America, but did you know that Americans actually take most European critiques as compliments? Here are eight European criticisms that Americans will actually say "thank you" to!
You guys have enough guns to blow up the world four times over!: Heck yes we do.
You don't speak any language but English: Because we're winners. Appreciate the reminder.
You call football "soccer" and you're terrible at it: Yeah, we're not all gay. Thanks for noticing!
Nobody uses public transit: Absolutely. Isn't freedom amazing?
You still believe in God: Thanks, pretty cool having the light of Reason.
You have military bases in every country: Aw, you're welcome little bro.
Your portion sizes are ridiculous: We know, isn't this 72-ounce steak beautiful? Brings tears to your eyes.
You don't have universal healthcare: Yup, it's pretty cool getting to see a doctor instead of waiting until you're dead.
Keep the encouragement coming, Europe!