Everybody has an opinion about the presidential debate. My opinion is that America desperately needs new technology to improve the closed-captioning function on televisions because mine was blown to smithereens Thursday night.
For this reason I give credit to the people at CNN. The cable news channel did a good job deciphering much of what President Joe Biden said when he squared off against Donald Trump, and I am genuinely grateful for their transcription efforts, which were Herculean.
In the spirit of providing clarity to other debate watchers whose closed captioning function also blew up Thursday, we’ve assembled a collection of statements from the president, outlining his agenda for the next four years.
Immigration
Joe Biden: “And I’m going to continue to move until we get the total ban on the – the total initiative relative to what we’re going to do with more Border Patrol and more asylum officers.”
The Economy
Joe Biden: “And the situation is making – and we’re going to make that available to everybody, to all Americans. So we’re working to bring down the price of – around the kitchen table. And that’s what we’re going to get done.”
Inflation
Joe Biden: “I come from Scranton, Pennsylvania. I come of household where the kitchen table – if things weren’t able to be met during the month, was a problem. Price of eggs, the price of gas, the price of housing, the price of a whole range of things.”
Taxes
Joe Biden: “We’d be able to help make sure that all those things we need to do – childcare, elder care, making sure that we continue to strengthen our healthcare system, making sure that we’re able to make every single solitary person eligible for what I’ve been able to do with the – with – with – with the COVID. Excuse me, with dealing with everything we have to do with – look, if – we finally beat Medicare.”
Terrorism
Joe Biden: “The only terrorist who has done anything crossing the border is one who came along and killed three under his administration, killed – an al-Qaida person in his administration, killed three American soldiers – killed three American soldiers. That’s the only terrorist that’s there.”
Ending the Hamas-Israel War
Joe Biden: “The first stage is to treat the hostages for a ceasefire. Second phase is a ceasefire with additional conditions. The third phase is know the end of the war. The only one who wants the war to continue is Hamas, number one. They’re the only ones standing down (ph).”
Abortion
Joe Biden: “I supported Roe v. Wade, which had three trimesters. First time is between a woman and a doctor. Second time is between the doctor and an extreme situation. And a third time is between the doctor – I mean, it’d be between the woman and the state.”
Domestic Violence
Joe Biden: “Look, there’s so many young women who have been – including a young woman who just was murdered and he – he went to the funeral. The idea that she was murdered by a – by –by an immigrant coming in, and they talk about that. But here’s the deal, there’s a lot of young women who are being raped by their – by their in-laws, by their – by their spouses, brothers and sisters, by – just – it’s just – it’s just ridiculous.”
Military Affairs
Joe Biden: “And the military, you know, when he was president, they were still killing people in Afghanistan. And he didn’t do anything about that. When he was president, we were still finding ourselves in a position where you had a notion that we were this safe country. The truth is, I’m the only president this century that doesn’t have any this – this decade, that doesn’t have any troops dying anywhere in the world, like he did.”
Public Health
Joe Biden: “I’m going to make sure we do something about what we’re doing on lead pipes and all the things that are causing health problems for people across the country.”
Golf
Joe Biden: “Well, anyway, that’s – anyway, just take a look at what he says he is and take a look at what he is. Look, I’d be happy to have a driving contest with him. I got my handicap, which, when I was vice president, down to a 6.”