It has come to our attention that the delightfully witty satirists of The Washington Post are going on strike this week. We here at The Babylon Bee stand in solidarity with our fellow comedians and join them in demanding fair wages. The writers at WP work hard to bring us their daring and uproarious brand of comedy every day, and they deserve compensation for their work.
Where else can we find comedic gems like "Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, austere religious scholar at helm of Islamic State, dies at 48" or "Does that Jason Aldean song go on a playlist? Or a watchlist?" Where else can we find stories on race, gender, and foreign policy so consistently hilarious that they brighten our days and keep us hungrily coming back for more again and again?
Like, doesn't Jeff Bezos own the company? That guy has tons of money, doesn't he? Surely he can afford to pay the comedians of The Washington Post a living wage and enable them to keep bringing us laughs. In dark times like these, where college students are being misgendered by the hundreds and Elon Musk exists, we need laughs more than ever.
We hope that you will join us in solidarity with some of the funniest comedy writers to ever grace the internet. We need them back. Please, stand with us.