We have a lot of feelings right now, and it's hard to process. Sometimes, we just want to say a cussword, like unbelievers or lesser satire sites, like The Onion, which is the atheist knockoff of The Babylon Bee. But we will refrain from doing so. Instead, here are ten G-rated cuss words to describe Joe Biden:
1. No-good son of a biscuit - Sometimes he just makes us so frakkin' mad!
2. Dog-faced pony soldier - This one's technically not vulgar so it's OK to use his own insult against him.
3. A real donkeyhole - This is borderline offensive but we feel the gravity of the situation calls us to use the D-word.
4. An ass but just in the way the King James Version uses it - Loophole!
5. #@$)(#@)()@#$3247@$#%@#%$&%&#@*&%#*& - Sorry, we lost control for a second there.
6. A foolish virgin who didn't take any oil to meet the bridegroom - Brutal and savage, but accurate.
7. A Harry Potter fan - Now that's just low.
8. A dog who returns to his own vomit - Kinda accurate tbh.
9. A real donkeywipe - Might want to stop reading this list to your kids at this point.
10. A confused, lost, senile old man who's unfit for the presidency - Sorry, someone had to say it.
Feel free to use any of these when discussing the president!