Today
the last of the US forces stationed at Bagram Air Base in Afghanistan were
making their final departure, as the Biden administration began the handover to
a fragile alliance. But who really needs to answer questions from the press on
that kind of monumental foreign policy decision when there is a giant cooler of
16-cent hotdogs waiting in the yard in Delaware?
You could almost see the outlines of
Biden’s board shorts under his pressed slacks on this, the first Friday he
hasn’t left Washington in…well, he can’t remember. The President was so ready
for his Fourth of July party to start that he snapped at fearless reporters,
who dared use the holiday occasion to question the commander-in-chief about
Bagram. ‘I want to talk about happy things, man,’ he clapped back. Happy things
like our racist anthem, our racist flag and our very problematic gatherings
over this weekend, according to the new Uncle Sam himself, Anthony Fauci?
No, Biden’s Fourth of July is about
revving those damn monster truck engines, throwing your grandkids into the pool
and forgetting about them, blowing your adult son’s allowance at the strip
club.
‘I’m concerned that you guys are asking
me questions that I’ll answer next week. It’s the holiday weekend. I’m going to
celebrate it,’ Biden said. As you
should, Mr President. Gas for $4 a gallon? Record inflation, rising crime and a
tenuous withdrawal from a 20-year war? That can all wait — and the little
babies in the media daring to ask a hard question of Ol’ Joe once every six
months had better understand that.
The presidenting can take a back seat
until Tuesday. The ice cream cannot. When Joe wants fireworks and an extra hour
to sleep in, that’s what Joe is going to get, according to Co-President Dr Jill
Biden.
America, you are put on notice, leave
the malarkey and the questions about our Armed Forces on your way out the door.
The President won’t be able to hear them over the roar of the Trans-Am. This is
Joe’s weekend, man — and America better get that straight.