WASHINGTON, D.C.—During an explosive Senate hearing this week, Senator and trusted medical doctor Rand Paul argued with Anthony Fauci—a dangerous conspiracy theorist who thinks vaccines don't work and that the government is not funding the creation of medical abominations in secret labs.
"You are a LIAR!" said Rand Paul, pointing gravely at Dr. Fauci. "You are a LYING LIAR who LIES!"
Fauci, who was initially taken aback by the accusation, immediately recovered and said: "NO! It is YOU who is the LIAR, you LIAR!" Fauci then bobbed his head back and forth in a very sassy way and snapped his fingers in a zig-zag pattern.
"OOOOooo! Rand Paul got OWNED!" said CNN.
"OOOOooo! Fauci got DESTROYED!" said Fox News.
The C-SPAN segment immediately went viral, leading to more requests for the two men to face off in another confrontation. C-SPAN then announced they would be organizing a pay-per-view rematch, in which the trusted medical doctor and Dr. Fauci would call each other liars in an octagon-shaped cage.
Unfortunately, Fauci backed out at the last minute after C-SPAN instituted a strict "no bioweapons" policy for the face-off.