Wednesday, July 14, 2021

Capitalism: Pros And Cons



Should you be a capitalist? There seems to be a fierce debate raging on whether capitalism is good or bad, and we're here to help you sort it all out with our decades of combined experience with capitalism.

To make it easy, we broke it all down in this handy-dandy list. Here are all the pros and cons of capitalism:


Pro: You reap the benefits of innovation and efficiency that socialist countries can only dream of

Con: Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2


Pro: A standard of living exceeding that of any time in recorded history

Con: Poor people can only afford an iPhone 8


Pro: Free speech! 

Con: Alyssa Milano also gets free speech


Pro: An abundance of affordable culinary delights even the great Pharaohs of Egypt could never imagine

Con: Pineapple pizza


Pro: The poor get richer

Con: They get richer at a slower rate than rich people and that's totally not fair 


Pro: Access to all the world's information in the palm of your hands

Con: Sometimes the wifi is a little spotty ...ugh


Pro: An environment of free expression results in iconic movie franchises

Con: Disney buys them all and runs them into the ground


Pro: Eating Taco Bell

Con: Digesting Taco Bell 


Pro: A vast library of streaming entertainment to choose from

Con: You will never see any of it because your wife will spend the entire evening trying to choose


Pro: Liberty

Con: Responsibility


We think that pretty much covers it! Now go forth, and enjoy your freedom responsibly! And if you don't, don't worry-- the government will take care of you.