U.S.-MEXICO BORDER—At a migrant child facility near the U.S.-Mexico border in southern Arizona, children caught wind of Kamala Harris coming to visit them, hearing her cackle from thousands of miles away.
"El diablo viene! El diablo viene! Dios mio!" cried hundreds of migrant children as they heard her approach. But quickly, a plan was hatched: the clever children decided to dress themselves up as "mostly peaceful protesters" in hopes that Kamala would raise their bail and free them from captivity.
Children from Central and South America dyed their hair purple, donned Che Guevara T-shirts, and began brandishing bricks and Molotov cocktails so that "la hiena del diablo" might see them and have mercy.
"It's a genius plan," said one CNN analyst. "Once she sees these poor kids looking like Antifa protesters and BLM rioters, surely she'll realize they don't need to be locked up. She'll free them in no time."
Unfortunately, Harris simply planted marijuana on them, locked them up forever, and began using them to make license plates.