U.S.—A new study has found that Biden has successfully handled the border crisis by reducing the amount of media coverage of the border crisis by 867%.
"Biden has expertly handled this crisis, reducing the number of media reports of the problem significantly," said Jen Psaki in a press conference today. "Under the previous administration, there were thousands of news stories a day on the poor conditions of the migrants at the border. Under Biden, that number is way, way lower."
Estimates suggest that whereas there was a steady stream of reports about bad conditions, inept government action, and inhumane handling of migrants who had crossed the border, Biden has "built a wall" around the information coming from the border, so that the influx of news stories has all but stopped.
"As Biden continues to expertly handle the crisis of media coverage, we expect the number of news stories to be reduced down to Obama administration levels in no time," Psaki said proudly.
"But what about the kids in cage--" one Newsmax reporter began, only for Psaki to pull a handle and send him plummeting through a trap door.