Report:
Day 3 of self-isolation
and family already needs ‘correcting’
Day 3 of self-isolation
and family already needs ‘correcting’
Many people are just three days into self-isolation and are already reporting that their entire family needs ‘correcting’.
A whole host of sinister spirits have manifested in people’s homes, insisting that they ‘correct’ their family.
‘Awfully annoying, aren’t they sir? No-one would blame you for ‘correcting’ them, as you see fit,’ one spirit is reported to have said.
While the exact nature of what ‘correcting’ means has yet to be specified, many are feeling a strong-pull towards sharp objects such as knives and axes.
‘I never noticed how nice this axe feels in my hands before. It’s weighty and satisfying. I think I’ll carry it around with me for a while,’ one dad said.
Families are now being warned to check on what family members are writing on their computers, laptops, tablets and phones regularly.
If it’s ‘All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy’ over and over again, run to your nearest maze.