Monday, December 2, 2019

Malarkey!

Only someone who thinks he’s running for President in 1920 and not 2020 would think using Malarkey is timely.

In what can only be described as an effort to confirm that near-octogenarian Joe Biden is just too damn old and out of touch to run for President, the Biden Campaign unveiled his latest slogan: No Malarkey.

I guess “No Malarkey” was chosen since Tippecanoe and Tyler Too was already taken.

Now, malarkey is a perfectly okay word.  But there’s no denying it is rather antiquated.  Only someone who thinks he’s running for President in 1920 and not 2020 would think using Malarkey is timely.

Joe even has his own “No Malarkey” bus.


I’m surprised it isn’t a steam engine vehicle.

“Fired up” seems a rather modern phrase for such an antiquated slogan.

Perhaps Joe should have tweeted “Twenty-three skidoo!  We’re cranking up the ole jalopy and headin’ your way!”


As dated and weird as “No Malarkey” might be, I suppose it could’ve been worse.

Joe could’ve chosen “No Horsefeathers!”  Or “No Balderdash!”

He might as well have chosen “I’m really old and out of touch!” Then again, that probably wouldn’t fit on the side of a bus.

If Joe starts appearing on stage with girls dressed as flappers, we’ll know his campaign is over.

Then again, he’s on stage nibbling on his wife’s fingers.


So maybe the weird behavior bar is set rather low for old Malarkey Joe.

On the plus side, at least he isn’t nibbling on an underage girl.  That’s a small mercy.

There is no doubt that Biden’s biggest liability is his age.  Voters watch this old coot bumbling and stammering while his teeth fall out and his eye bleeds, and naturally they’re concerned that he’s not well enough to even run for President — let alone serve four years in the White House.

So why in Lucifer’s reach would his campaign choose “No Malarkey” as a catch phrase?

You’d have to be a special kind of stupid to think that would allay voters’ concerns that Joe is past his sell date.